By Adira Royal
During Transformation there are times you must apologize to God, whoever you offended unknowingly or knowingly and yourself. Strange as it may seem I must say I do what I do to help others but sometimes your help is offensive to others. People take your kindness as a kick in the gut or perhaps as a direct attack on them. Nevertheless, I do not know who I hurt, disgraced, offended or wounded in some way but I sincerely apologize. All I ever tried to do was show love. As weird or painful to others as my expression may be.
Now I am not apologizing for showing love only for my offensive expression that may have wounded you. Oooooh are there many… Things such as sending provocative photos, or videos to loved ones and they were shown. Or sharing private information about things or people in my life without their permission. Yes, I have offended people and the God of the Universe. Now as it remains life may never return to the way it has been for me. That is something that goes with the territory. However, knowing that I am not heartless but sensitive to the fact that others pain is important. Although, my story needs to be told and you may be a part of that story because of the way the influences has shaped my life. There is no reason to hurt people as I also acknowledge the fact when in pain sometimes pain is inflicted on those who we least expect.
The Pandemic was painful but a blessing. The scam was painful but it taught me to be careful, be more aware and not as trusting when it comes to my money. No more online dating for me maybe not at all for a while. During this time it has become evident that I am a curious, risky, enjoy adventures and keep myself locked up for fear of the unknown. Where the heck did I learn that behavior?
It doesn’t matter where I gleaned this behavior. What matters is changing it and learning how to navigate through life “Living” not existing. Time is teaching me the value of every interaction, rejection, loss, mess up, moment of peace and even confusion. What is this lesson here to teach me? I hear all the time forget your past, and move on. Do we ever truly forget the past what are the magnificent story tellers, all genres of music, rappers, screen writers, orators, play writers, transformational or motivational speakers, preachers and teachers where is the platform created? What is the basis of why they speak of look where I come from if they forgot their past. There is a short story, a memoir, a documentary, movie, video, music or song…
So I digress my lovelies to expression of Love. No matter what happens in this life I try to remember the good times. Make new memories, appreciate what I have while creating what I look forward to in the future. It is not always easy but it is not always hard either.
The past is history that ultimate becomes a guide, lesson, or a coach for someone to live by. A good example is the Bible, history books, chemistry books, encyclopedia, the dictionary all past experiences or knowledge that help us create what we know as our present and future. Children are creations from our past full of potential for the future. Although they are not replicas of their parents there are strong attributes of both parents in them.
Some of our children deserve apologies for who we decided to procreate with but thats another blog post…. Nevertheless, You deserve the best of what life has to offer in this life and it is my prayer that it comes to you all.